I have always asked myself this question as I was living abroad away from my homeland. Is home where I was born and raised up? or is it where I am living at the time being? Is it the place where you have your beloved ones, relatives and friends? or is it the feeling of missing a certain place, or is it where you feel safe. Where is home exactly...what is it and what kind of feeling is this?
I think to answer this very difficult question, one has to look at one's heart and feel what is home.
I think the definition of home is different for every person. Home for some people is a mother's hug, discussing and arguing with little siblings :-), eating the food of you country. Is home where one was raised up or is it the place where one used to play with other children. Is it the place where one carries memories for?
Some would agree with this but what about people who feel like strangers although they are at home. Could home be counted in this case as home? In dictatorship countries, people do not feel at home because they feel that their values are different from the values of their own country/country people. The balance of values is upside down. What is abnormal is normal. So if I want to speak and express my opinion I cant. I have respect for others but others don’t have respect for me. I want to do something for my country but the rulers in my country do not allow me do something for my country. People then start looking for another home may be by looking for another country to settle in. However, in the new country, it is still not home. The people look different, eat different, think different, have other values and one feels like a stranger although the balance of values is right up and what is abnormal is seen abnormal. So they go looking again for home. Is it back there home or is in the new chosen home?
Another situation of feeling stranger in your own homeland is when people around you doubt your identity. In Germany I met a lot of Turks, who are born in Germany, speak German, feel German but the people around them always doubt their German identity because of their Turkish origins. The result is that they don’t feel home neither in Germany nor in Turkey. They always told me totally bluffed, “I don't know where is home! it is not in Germany, and it is not in Turkey”. This is a very sad situation.
I asked someone, who has lived in many countries and in many places in his own country, about where he feels at home. Although he likes the city and can not imagine himself living somewhere else but for him home is the village where he was born and raised up in. He can go everywhere but at the end he feels only home back there in his village.
I know a colleague who used to study abroad and was feeling all the time homesick until she got married to someone from the country where she was studying. Since then the feeling of being homesick has changed. She still loves her country, wants to be back to it but can not imagine living at her homeland without her husband. For her he is her home.
What about you? Have you been through this dilemma before? Do you know where home is or you are still looking for home like me? What does your heart tell you?
